Funny Christmas songs

There are so many ways to write. I always thought it would be fun to be a song writer.  I enjoy all kinds of songs, especially this time of year, inspiration, relaxing, energetic and funny. Following are some humorous songs that also bring back memories.

“All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth” – My daughter lost two teeth when fell out of bed at age 2, We found a cabbage patch doll for her that had red hair and was missing two front teeth. We sang that song to her for years until her permanent teeth finally came in. 

“I want a hippopotamus for Christmas, only a hippopotamus will do,” from a Family Circus special was always a favorite of my daughter. This past year, my niece adopted a kitten and named her Pippa. She is cute but a little overweight, so now we sing. I want a pippopotamus for Christmas, only a pippapotamus will do.

The song “Grandma got run over by a reindeer,” years ago became “Gov Mandel got run over by a reindeer, walking from the State House Christmas Eve. Now you may not believe in Santa, but we in Maryland, we believe.”

“The Aluminum Christmas” Tree by David DeBoy song reminds me of my aunt, who had one. She had a light set that shine on it and made it look like it changed colors.  I don’t think she used it very many years. It was too different. But this song brings back those memories. As he sings, it was shiny, like a tree you might see on Mars. It might cause LSD flashbacks and watch out for sparks.

One of my favorite humorous Christmas songs Is “Crabs for Christmas.” A big fella from Mary land, in his bowling league coat and Oriole cap, tells a Houston Santa that he wants crabs for Christmas. Steamed crabs and a beer would be like a trip back to ole Bal-ti-more.

I have enjoyed the songs on his album so much that I had a copy mailed to my daughter when she was living in England and have given copies to many friends and relatives. Marble stoops, sauerkraut, Natty Bo, wise men painted on screens, beehive hairdos and Mayor Schaefer swimming in the Aquarium’s seal pool.

David Deboy really captured the people and events of those days in his hilarious songs. I agree with what he says, “these memories live on, inside of me.” It must be wonderful to help people remember the good times.

NaNoWriMo

The goal of NaNoWriMo is to write a 50,000 novel in 30 days. Writers are encouraged to get their ideas down quickly, to tell the story. What matters in NaNoWriMo is output. It is about quantity, not quality. The next month (or months) they can edit and build on what they have written.

So many writers like the challenge of uncensored writing. It is an opportunity to be creative, to write without  being judged by others or by yourself. True, you could be successful by writing the same word 50,000 times, but most writers want to create something, even if it is crap that will need a lot of work later.

 I was successful one out of three attempts, but I am trying it again. Even if I do not complete 50,000 words, I am that much further ahead. I save what I have written and may edit and complete that novel in the future.

I hate to take this time away from writing my NaNoWriMo story, but I worry that I take too many “vacations” from my blog. I am trying to continue writing for my blog and in my personal journal.

This practice of intense writing is critical to becoming productive writers. It also can help us find our voice, since we are not changing our words constantly and just write what we are thinking. We can improve upon it later.

NaNoWriMo is not the only concentrated effort for writers. Some friends of mine are attempting to write a picture book each day, http://www.theresabook.com/picture-book-challenge/. Others are writing a poem a day for the November PAD (Poem A Day) Chapbook Challenge. More information about that is available on Robert Lee Brewer’s blogs; either My Name is Not Bob, robertleebrew.blogspot.com/ or his Poetic Asides blog.

I also heard about a program for scriptwriters, www.scriptfrenzy.org/. I am sure there are many more challenges available. Obviously, many types of writers stress the importance of getting something down on paper. They do not expect us to continue this every day forever, but to get used to the idea of writing daily, the idea of pants in the chair. Keep writing or your ideas will fade.

I’ve had characters seem to come alive in my head and urge me to tell their story, but then leave me when I didn’t start to write about what I pictured them saying and doing. Later when I decided I had time to tell that story, they would not come back. Occasionally I jot down an idea or brief memory, in hopes that eventually that storyline and those characters will again come alive for me.

NaNoWriMo and similar programs offer us a chance to push ourselves. No one is going to criticize you if you do not finish. They won’t even know if you don’t tell them, like I just did, but you will have tried something new and have something tangible for your efforts. Write and have fun.

Authors' Day

National Authors’ Day is observed on November 1 each year. As an avid reader, I will naturally be recognizing the day by reading more. Carroll County Farmers’ Market will recognize the occasion with the addition of almost a dozen local authors selling and signing their books.

A resolution by the US Department of Commerce states that celebrating Authors’ Day show appreciation of the men and women who made American literature possible, but encourages and inspires others.

I will participate Saturday, November 3, at the authors’ event at the Agricultural Center with my chapbook Mountain Musings. This is a chance to meet local authors and shop for produce and crafts. Authors at some past events included Laura Bowers, K. Michael Crawford, Henry Ditman, David Faulkner, John H.Feortschbeck Sr., Joseph Fleck, Jean Green, Linet Kiplagat, Granville Hibberd, Jim Huckleberry, Carol Joyce, Lois Szymanski, Hattie Wheeler, Catherine Baty and Jerry Trescott. Adult novels, children’s books, poetry and historical books will be available at the Ag Center.

Unfortunately I will be missing most of a meeting at Starry Night Bakery (1 to 3 pm) featuring information about publishing.

My chapbook also is available at Eclecticity, located at John and Winter Street, in Westminster, MD. The eclectic store offers a variety of books, works from local authors, and poetry anthologies by One Tree Productions, as well as art, music and much more. The Carroll County’s Historical Society’s Shop at Cockey’s sells books from local authors topics such as historical landmarks, graves and burial sites, ghosts and legends and more. We readers need to support our area bookstores and libraries, as well as our authors. Carroll County is lucky to have a variety of writers’ groups, book clubs and poetry readings.

November 1 also is the beginning of National Novel Writers’ Month, which challenges authors to write 50,000 words in 30 days. I completed the challenge once in three tries. Here I go again. Several organizations are having write-ins, offering space and quiet for writers. For more information about this writing challenge, check out www.nanowrimo.org.

I hope I didn't rush through this too quickly. I am trying to beat the possible loss of electricity from Hurricane Sandy. Just let me know if you want any more details about the above events.

Barbara Morrison speaking

Barbara Morrison, who wrote Innocent: Confessions of a Welfare Mother, will be the featured speaker at the October meeting of the Carroll County Chapter of the Maryland Writers Association.

Do you think acceptance is the end of your toil as an author? Come hear about how Barbara tackled the task of promoting her book so successfully.

The meeting will be on Saturday, October 13 at 1:00 pm at the Westminster Library, 50 E Main St, Westminster, Maryland 21157.

She grew up in a prosperous neighborhood and graduated with a BA in English. However, a few years later her marriage collapsed and she found herself forced to go on welfare to care for her two small sons.

 This award winning author is also a poet, publisher, teacher and dancer. More information about Barbara is available at bmorrison.com.

A writers’ group I belong to recently held a contest. The rules were to write a short story with a beginning, middle and end, in three sentences. I find it fun to try new things. Below are some of my attempts for this contest.

1 – The young couple talked and dreamed of a better, safer world. They fell in love and had a son, their future. They named him Adolf.

2 - Every Saturday Roger flew below the clouds in his Cessna 150, away from the cares of the world. In the sky he escaped from his low-paying job and his unfaithful wife. One day Roger flew his little Cessna until, out of gas, it returned to the world on its own, leaving his mind in the heavens forever.

3 - Yousef ran for his life from his burning village. He ran from the soldiers, trying to make him and his friends like them. He kept running in races all the way to the Olympics.

4 – Patches the donkey eyed the lovely flowers. He bent over and put his nose into one, jumping back when a bee stung him. He learned that beauty can hold danger.

Have a try. It is fun and maybe it can give you an idea for a full story or a poem.